A Polish Sunday with my Family

8:00- Mom rolls over in bed and turns on the Polish community radio show
8:30- Whoever needs a shower contemplates getting up now or waiting until other goes. " My hair needs to dry, but it's so warm here, uh oh, I think Tata is going for it!!....wait, false alarm that's him going out to walk the dog. But I should get up..." etc. etc.
9:00- Anyone that is either a) really hungry b) wants to suck up to the parents, starts making breakfast which usually constitutes of just setting out all the ingredients for, wait for it......KANAPKI (sandwiches, which in Polish families constitutes 50% of meals). So the table is covered with jars of jam, tubs of *Polish* cream cheese, packages of fresh deli slices bought at the *Polish* stand at the farmer's market, and bread that my dad made himself (new obsession). Mama has been feeling unlike herself lately and the occasional plate of french toast or eggs has found its way to the table.
9:30- Everyone finally make their way to the kitchen table and gorge themselves. When everyone is stuffed Mama brings some cake out and everyone enjoys that with a cup of lemon tea.
10:15- The rush for the bathroom round II starts because:
                    a) There are 4 girls in this family
                    b) There are only 2 bathrooms
                    c) This is the one day a week my Dad shaves
                    d) Polish people at church judge, therefore you must have impeccable hair and makeup
10:15-10:50- Everyone is getting ready to look their Sunday best. If you don't, Mama will make you change. You cannot look:
                   a) frumpy
                   b) skanky
                   c) casual
                   d)  too trendy
                   e) poor
                   f) scandalous
                   g) be wearing any type of denim
10:50- The shoe issue.
10:55- Everyone piles into the mini-van where Mama quickly turns the radio to the Polish station. "What if we miss something important?!"
11:10- We are at the Polish Church way too early, but I guess it takes a while to walk from the parking lot in these heels and "a little time to prepare never hurt anyone"
11:30- Mass starts. All the Polish ladies make sure to register exactly who is and isn't there. Who trickles in late, who leaves during the Mass.
12:15- The line to Holy Communion becomes a catwalk where everyone evaluates and judges the outfit, size, hair colour and shoes of the devotee. And woe on whoever doesn't get up to go receive Communion, everyone is thinking of all the horrible things you must of done to bring your soul to such a state.
12:30- Mass end and everyone groups up to talk, gossip, and make coffee dates.
1:00- The family finally gets in the car and drives home.
3:00- Early dinner that everyone MUST be present at.
3:45- The cake is gone and the cups that were filled with coffee are empty,
4:00- "Is there a new episode of _________________( insert name of Polish show)?" "yes, I think so!" They invade the basement to watch their fill of tv on full volume so that I cannot focus on the homework I have been attempting to do.